She Gave Him Everything

Tonight I watched my little boy play ball outside with his dad.
I watched him laugh with his friends and tease his sister.

I held him as he snuggled in my lap after his bath
as I kissed his still baby soft cheeks and hugged him tight
and debated back and forth over which of us loved the other more.

I cuddled with him in bed
as we read about men from the Old Testament
and smiled as he said he wished we'd named him Joseph
because he wanted to have a name from the Bible.

I prayed aloud with him that he would grow big and strong
never forgetting what Jesus had done for him
and that he would live up to the name we did give him
Alexander...defender of mankind
Christian...follower of Christ.

And then I came downstairs
and I heard this song for the first time
and I remembered.

I remembered that day
over 6 years ago,
when we stood beside her hospital bed
watching and praying
as she held him in her arms
and covered his little head
with kisses
and tears.

I remembered how she stood before us a few hours later
with resolve in her heart
and tears on her cheeks
and how she tenderly placed him in my arms
hugged us both
and then walked out of the hospital
empty.

She could have made a different choice.
She could have chosen to not be inconvenienced with 9 months of pregnancy
or the pain of labor.
She could have chosen not to deal with the emotional turmoil of saying goodbye to the one she had carried inside her for so long. 
She could have chosen so very differently.

But instead
she chose to give him life.

And then
she chose to give him to us.

This dear, dear woman
who displayed one of the most selfless acts of love imaginable
gave my son life
and in so doing
she gave him
everything.

A hope.
A future.
Everything.

And tonight I am overwhelmed with thankfulness
for that little boy asleep in his bed,
for his birth mom who chose to give him life,
and for the One, full of grace,
who ordained every day of his life
before one of them came to be,
who out of great love for us all,
set him into our family at just the right time,
and who allows me,
undeserving as I am,
to be the one he calls
Mom.